Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Getting a little quiet around here!

Ok, so no one has posted in a while. We need something fun to get it started again!

Here's a quiz from facebook that someone just sent me:

1. Do you believe people sometimes activate the 911 system just so they have a story to tell thier friends and family?

a) Heavens no! Why would someone do that.

b) Sometimes, but then again it gives me a good story.

c) Absolutely!

2. Have you ever wiped your feet "after coming out of someones home"?

a) Oh yeah! I have even thrown them away before getting in the truck. Used their trash can as a matter of fact.

b) Sometimes, but that is just the way it goes.

c) I would never do something as insulting as that. I am sure they were getting ready to clean up before we got there.

3. Have you ever deliberately called a patient the wrong name just for enjoyment?

a) Golly gee, no! How disrespectful!

b) Only once, and I was sorry.

c) No, that would me to inquire what their real name is so I could call them by a different name. Too much effort!

4. Have you ever just opened the door to the ambulance, pointed to the cot, said "Sit", and drove to the hospital without saying another word?

a) Seriously, people do that? That is an atrocity.

b) Every run!

c) Only if they have trouble hearing or language impaired.

5. Have you ever provoked a patient to antagonize the police just so you can watch them get tazed?

a) You are kidding, right?

b) No, I render care to enough peole who have been tazed. I don't need to create more work.

c) Hell yes! I don't care who you are that's some funny shit!
6. Have you ever prompted a faking trauma patient into saying their different parts of their body hurt just so you can cut their $100.00 jeans, $300.00 coat, and $75.00 shirt off their lying ass body?

a) Who prompts? Just start cutting! Hold them down if necessary. Lying pieces of sh*t!

b) OMG! Who does this? That is horrible.

c) No, why make more work for yourself.
7. Do you think EMS should be able to issue cab vouchers?

a) No! Obviously if they called 911, they need help.

b) In some cases this would be appropriate.

c) Why can't dispatchers just fax them out and save me the trouble?

8. Have you ever told a patient the voices in their head actually would prefer they stay home and not call again?

a) Yes, yes I have and I will not apoligize for it.

b) No, easier to haul them in than to come back in two hours.

c) I would never knownly mess with a person's psychosis.
9. Have you ever "accidently/deliberately" broke something each time you go to a frequent flyer's house?

a) Too much paperwork.

b) I am not even going to dignify this question with an answer!

c) Judge & Punish, baby! Lets get it on!
10. Have you ever made a patient cry from a well deserved EMS-Come-To-Jesus talk?

a) No, easier to just haul them to the ER.

b) I hate this test! You people are horrible!

c) I have tears on the fender of the squad where most dweebs put storks
wow.....some of these questions are pretty far out there. Deliberatly breaking something in a house? Egging on psych calls? And what exactly is a EMS-Come to Jesus talk??